Who am I at the End of 2023?

(Article Updated from 7/4/04)

How often do we reach a point where we talk to someone daily or ask ourselves, who am I? The question usually is asked when we are going through some things. Something is out of balance in our lives, so we turn inward to ask questions to which we already know the answer. Why am I here, in this place, currently, a member of this family?

We must only look at our roots to find our souls’ origin. Most originated in Arkansas. The surnames are Belin ~ Childs ~ Green ~ Hall ~ Hampton ~Momon ~ Johnson ~ Phifer ~ Tatum ~ Trotter ~Wheller ~ Webb ~ Wright ~ Woods ~ Harmon ~ Falls ~ Hayes ~ Neal ~ Pickett ~ Purifoy ~ Strong ~ Griffin ~ Lovett ~ Gardner ~ Newton ~Wiley ~ Jones ~ Boswells ~ Wynter ~ White and Davis. One only needs to trace our ancestry to discover who we are and whence we originated.

Think of your great-grandmother great-grandfather. Mine are Sally (Davis) and David’ Sambo’ Hampton. My grandfather, John Hampton, was born in that union. He married my grandmother, Gracie Hall. My father, Codis Sr, was their firstborn. They were married, raising their own family in the heart of Arkansas Jim Crow’s South. They survived, even prospered, to provide our mothers and fathers a place on this earth. My parents were part of the black folk migration out of the South, headed east, west, or north, looking for a better way of life. Thus, my parents, aunts, uncles, and assorted cousins ended up in Milwaukee.

Big Mama, Big Papa, or old dude included when we look at our fathers and their family values. These are our people, our kinfolk whom we examined closely to find the depths of our character. At this stage in my life, I am the age my Grandparents, Uncles, and Cousins were toward the end of their existence on earth. I’ve laughed with my sister and cousins about that fact.

Don’t forget our sisters and brothers. Check out their mannerisms, how they talk, move, walk, fidget, twitch, or even when relaxing in a reflective mood. Look closely and ask questions about your heritage from those individuals. They will tell you who you are.

They may not explain it in words or actions you can readily see—answers entwined in stories about other relatives. You may pick up specific nuances in their southern or black person dialect. Some may call it Ebonics’…we call it family speaks. We can look at family members to see our characteristics. Or we can look in the mirror to see the product of our roots. The face staring back at you is who you are at any given time.

It’s funny, sometimes sad, that most knowledgeable relatives, familiar with our history because they lived it, have passed on to be with their maker, lord, and Savior. They didn’t have to be reminded by a political ad of the meaning of family. They remember what their parents and grandparents told them about being part of a family. They said family members with the same blood that runs through your veins are people you can count on when times are hard or when you need a helping hand. You can trust them. It would help if you did not misuse that trust.

For those who think we are dissing your homies. We know how you feel about your dog, your shorty, your squeeze, and the many other words of affection you may voice when speaking of someone close to you, someone you feel has your back. There is room for both family members and homies in your life. Facebook or other social media friends are not blood relatives. However, some may be better than a few blood relatives. We find no argument against a good social media friend. Yet, as noted, when it comes down to it, you are here because of the people who came before you. That happens to be factual and not up for debate.

We always like to emphasize that family comes first. Yet relationships, no matter the connection, are two ways, not one way. Unlike some who think they’re entitled to certain privileges because of their last name. You’re expected to contribute to the family’s reputation as a member in good standing. I often wonder how we, as baby boomers or graybeards, pass birthright to our offspring. How do we show you that blood is thicker than water? What do we need to do to make an impression on you? Even though television or movies stress individuality, including portraying what have you done for me lately attitudes. We must look to family for grounding.

We may hold monthly family get-togethers or dinners. We attend family reunions. Cousins who may not have known they were related meet and greet each other. The little kids can see they belong to more than just their immediate family. In other words, we can be who we want to be professionally. We can strive to reach the peak of our class. Some may soar above the clouds on the wings or a mentor. Others may achieve the ultimate personal satisfaction in any endeavor. Yet without someone to share it with, the accolades ring hollow after the initial celebration unless you have a family with whom to share a personal triumph.

Cliches like,” I knew you could do it, baby… that’s my son, my daughter”. A father said,” Son, I’m so proud of you today.” Or “Remember, sweetheart…wherever you go, you will still be daddy’s little girl.” You may have a crazy, lovable uncle to say, “That boy got all that stuff from me.” Or “that girl is the spitting image of her mother, my sister, and my dearly departed mother.” 

A wise man once said, “How can you get where you are going if you don’t know where you came from?” It doesn’t matter who someone else thinks we are. It does matter who we eventually become. We must ask ourselves if our ancestors would be proud of our accomplishments.

In this date and time, we are inundated with various crimes, daily shootings, a growing homeless population, family misunderstandings, unlawful and even prescribed drugs, along with an ever-growing impatient citizen who legally may be able to carry unconcealed weapons. Folks are getting fed up with the criminal element of our society, snatching and grabbing, among other things.

Our political process seems to be broken, drifting away from Democracy. A national election in 2024 with Trump heading for the Republican nomination? We remember the authoritative posture he represents. Are we headed for a dictator in the White House? All while the Democrat, current President Biden looks like his capability is in question. Why? Because of his age.  

Can you imagine all those folks at our borders clamoring to get into this country, adding to our problems? If they only knew. Our country seems to have less common sense, primarily in how we act toward others. Racism, homophobia, conservatism against liberals, some whites against anybody who isn’t, poor against the wealthy, you name it. The only people living prominent are the very rich in this country. The only way to change that situation is to vote people into office who are Americans without a destructive agenda. Slogans like “Make America Great Again” are a dog whistle to many anxious folks. For whatever reasons, they feel left out of the political process. They also want to be the ruling class. The question is, at what cost? My request of you is to be on guard. This is our country, too.   

Meanwhile, most of us live our daily lives dealing with the joys and sorrows contributing to our life experiences. Remember, we know who we are and what we stand for. That knowledge alone will help us get to where we are going.

Dedicated to my father, mother, stepmother…RIP Codis Sr, DoReatha Cole, and Rosalie Miller. To my uncles, aunts, cousins, Grand and Great Grandparents, thanks for the love and protection, along with providing an example for me to follow. It’s been a hell of a ride. A great life that I can genuinely say you ‘all laid the groundwork.

Happy Holidays, and may the new year of 2024 be as healthy and prosperous as you make it, from Sandra and Codis.

Peace, blessings, stay healthy and be vigilant for our American rights. Make it a day in which Jesus Christ would be proud of you,

Codis Hampton II                                                                                                   Author & Commentator

“The Episodic Thoughts of Hamp, Vol II” has been published. Check out my author webpage URL  https://outskirtspress.com/HampsEpisodicThoughtsVol2                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

Join us for our live or Internet broadcast of bi-monthly BTR R&B or Smooth Jazz Musical at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/hampscornerofamerica. Or play the broadcast at your leisure.

Follow Hamp at our Parent Company/Sponsor CHIIA Group at https://hcofa.net/

Copyright 2011 Codis Hampton II, all rights reserved. A bi-weekly blog for your enjoyment

Unnecessary use of an Adjective

Do you ever notice many people who use words like Unconditional or Unapologetic are often making an obvious point?

For instance, I’ve noticed some like to use say “Unconditional Love.” Frequently they are putting another person on notice as to how they should behave in a relationship. To love, regardless of the relationship, doesn’t require an adjective to improve the intensity of the emotion. All that is needed are reasons to feel that way about something or someone.

Love is a given; one doesn’t have to describe it in some unique way.  We don’t wait for someone to fall in love with us before we, in turn, love them. If they are our offspring, siblings, or parents, we love them because of our relationship. There are no other qualifications they have to go through to earn our love. The emotion is not always mutual or shared between two people. The explanation could be for numerous reasons. Whatever the reason, placing such an adjective in front of the word, love is not going to enable the other person to love you.

Say, for instance, your sibling, son, or daughter is socially challenged. They don’t interact with other people. Their social ideas are out of whack. Don’t have or can’t keep a friend, immature; they depend upon others to keep them fed, clothed, housed in a place to exist. Attempting to motivate these individuals is an endless exercise with no end in sight.

No one wants to take care of a grown man or woman. Relatives want you to succeed, show improvement, or at least try to become independent. If there are no signs that you are trying, one might be confronted with another adjective. Your relatives may indicate “Tough Love” is what you need, in place of money, or providing other subsistence items.

Tough Love may not be what they envision as assistance, yet it is the best remedy for individuals requiring motivation. Sometimes people need a reason to achieve the basics of need. Don’t underestimate a swift shove in the rear to get a person headed in the right direction.

Then there is the boisterous individual. The one who feels they have to get in your face to facilitate some response. We as Americans tend to overstate the urgency of something or the other. For instance, a man trying to make a point by stating he is “Unapologetic Black.”

The individual places his picture on a poster advertising his business. Keep in mind he wants some cooperation from outside his company. First of all, they can tell his race by looking at his picture on the poster. Or if there is no poster, those who he approaches will know his skin color.         

“Unapologetic Black” is a way of puffing up, sticking your chest out, which can intimidate the very people you need to cooperate with your plan. If not intimidation, then think of it as a turnoff.

It’s like sending an email to someone, whereas the entire communication is in capital letters. In such cases, one cannot get to the message because the all-caps smothering the wording.

That may not be the person’s intention, but someone will conclude the senders’ personality as uneducated. Or in the case of the guy on the poster, an angry, uncooperative individual.

As the face of your business, you have to show you’re able to converse in a way to satisfy investors, customers, or your employees. Any correspondence that reaches those people before you do will reflect your personality. In other words, your ability to listen to other ideas may get you that contract, loan, or donation.

One may consider these ideas as you are preparing a resume. You don’t know the personality of the Human Resource person. You must be smart when you are listing your hobbies. Somebody might be impressed if you are a dog lover, musician, or love Rhythm and Blues. That might interest the employer to place you above another individual.

Another way to think about this entire thought process is pretty much self-explanatory words matter in all types of communication. Words express how one feels, what they are going to do, even explain what one has done.

In summation, an adjective is a word or phrase naming an attribute, added to, or grammatically related to a noun to modify or describe it. Think before using them carelessly. Make sure they help you rather than turn people away from you. It applies to business or life.    

Peace, blessings, stay healthy, vigilant for our American rights. Make it a day in which Jesus Christ would be proud of you,

Codis Hampton II                                                                                          

Follow Hamp at https://twitter.com/#!/HampTwo   

Join us for the live broadcast of our bi-monthly BTR Musical Shows at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/hampscornerofamerica. Or play the broadcast at your leisure.

We present the republication of the Authors’ tour of South Korea as a 17-year-old GI with Unchon-ni, South Korea; I Remember 1962-63. Check out the details at https://outskirtspress.com/Unchonni

We are in a continuing effort to publicize, Gracie Hall-Hampton, the Arkansas Years 1917-1953. Based on the life of the Authors Grandmother. The Novel examines an era of Jim Crow that many in our society may have forgotten occurred against people of color. Meanwhile, we celebrate the publication of his fifth book, Misguided Intentions. A book where family relationships are questioned to the core. Read MI’s review at https://redheadedbooklover.com/gracie-hall-hampton-codis-hampton-ii/  Click on the publisher-Authors page at https://outskirtspress.com/MisguidedIntentions   

Our Parent Company and sponsor is CHIIA Group, online at https://hcofa.net/

Copyright 2011 Codis Hampton II, all rights reserved. A bi-weekly blog for your enjoyment